The Man Who Didn’t Believe In Love – by Don Miguel Ruiz
I really enjoyed listening to this, especially as it actually explained a few things about the relationship I was in for over 8 years not so long ago. Similarities I tell you. Realtionships. Actually very simple really.
Sit back, listen and see what you think. You may find some similarities if not answers that surprise you.
Now, lets see if you’re an addict!
The Man Who Didn’t Believe In Love – by Don Miguel Ruiz
We cannot be happy with anyone else if we are not happy with ourselves
We all know that relationships can be such a challenge, especially when life pulls us in opposite directions at the same time.
Isn’t it surprising how many people go through life not ever recognising that how they feel about other people is largely determined by how they feel towards themselves? If we are not comfortable within ourselves, we cannot be comfortable with anyone else.
Most peoples focus lies on how they are different from others as their personality feels the need to be unique and special . Differences hold the capacity to develop conflict, but at the same time, our Souls live through connection with others.
We are always challenged to grow above our personal preferences, so that we can discover how we and others are the same. Think about it, as the overall need lies in finding the balance of these two tendencies.
How to Mend a Broken Heart | I am NO Expert, but Self Love is a Succulent Gift
Article from violawoolcott.com from 2007
How can we mend a broken heart?
How can we stop the rain from falling?
How can we stop the sun from shining?
Stop the rain from falling? Stop the sun from shining? Is this really what we want?
I have asked myself this question many, many, many times in my life and I guess that could be something to “argue” about….
I don’t know why, but even I felt lonely tonight.
I decided to lay in my garden on my bench with loads of cushions, listening to my favourite music, with the sun blinder drawn to catch the rain drops and watching them roll down the blinder to just hit the floor……..
I laid there for ages thinking……. starting to feel the cold……. wishing to share the moment in time with someone…. but also knowing that the greatest gift I can give to myself is loving myself and therefore I wouldn’t feel lonely……….
…………..I am definately no expert and I certainly don’t have all of the answers, but I have been through a tremendous amount of experiences in my life and I am not only talking relationships………..but isn’t life and the choices we make what shapes us all? What “makes” us who we are? Who we have become? And if you think about it, aren’t you just grateful for all of your experiences? Of who you are? What you have become? NO doubt, I am!!
The greatest gift that we can receive is loving ourselves… in all aspects of our lives.
Love is the sweet nectar of our soul from which springs forth true abundance, bliss, as well as peace…the fountain of love and deep appreciation.
Loving yourself deeply will surprise you by the riches that come into your life as well as all the things that you have longed for that can be yours, provided that you live from a deep and unending well of self-love.
Don’t ever wish for the rain from falling….
Don’t ever wish for the sun from shining….
ENJOY and if you like let me know how it is that you feel!!
Everything I write is purely from my own point of view so it may not make sense to everyone else. I was thinking the other day, after disccussing this subject with a friend of mine, how complicated the mother/daughter relationship can be!
When my son was born he was already special in his own right, he was my first born. My first experience with a full term pregnancy, and all the ups and downs that go with it. He had, from the moment he was born, his rightful place in my life and in my heart and he will always be special to me.
Later though, when I thought about having another child, I realised how much I longed for a little girl. Someone who would be a minature, mini “me”. Someone I could dress up and spoil, and share all those feminine thoughts with that males just dont understand. “A soulsister”!
As it so happened I was very lucky that my second child was just that. A beautiful little girl who looked like her grandmother, but with curly hair (me again . I remember still how thrilled her father and I were, because apart from anything else, we were not planning other children so that this little girl just made our lives perfect.
Over the years of course it has not all been smooth sailing. My daughter and I have had plenty of fights. And tears. And misunderstandings. But we have a unique closeness. We understand each other. Our simple “femaleness” bonds us together in a way that can’t (I think) happen between mothers and sons, no matter how close they are. My daughter and I are on the same wavelength. The screaming and shouting matches are something we both need in our “female world”. They rock the boat, and afterwards we realise how great it is to sometimes be able to let off steam with someone who is going to love you anyway. Nothing can break this bond between us.
I have always felt this affinity with all things female. I quess men feel the same about other males. This basic understanding of what’s going on in their heads without having to ask. Sharing the same experiences of life.
For us girls of course, periods (the horror!), the first date. The first love. The first sexual experience. Weddings and then of course having our babies. I believe that we see our daughters as an extension of ourselves and that we want to protect them from all that can hurt them in life. From making the same mistakes (that we feel) we made in our own lives. Of course, this naturally leads to tensions and fights. It’s ok though and its the most natural relationship in the world. Girls are carrying on the cycle, our lives lived again as their lives. We speak the same language and experience the same emotions. Some would call this hormones, but I prefer to see it in a wider sense. How often do we hear people say “oh you dont get on because youre just too much alike!!” This is very true of the mother/daughter conflicts that can arise because we have been down this road and with the hindsight of experience we “know better”. In trying to protect our baby girls we tell her so. Naturally they don’t appreciate our wisdom and consequently the female feathers fly!!
I guess what I’m trying to say here is that no matter what problems we may have with our daughters, the relationship is unique. It’s very, very special and there is nothing which can change that, but we have to take a step back and let go a little when our daughters are struggling to become her own woman.
I once read a book about the relationships and affinities between all the women of the world which refered to us all as “sisters”. To me, the mother/daughter relationship is probably the most precious, and also, the most volatile of them all.
Breaking Up Is Hard To Do | Lets Split Up, Maybe Next Month | Delaying The Moment | Best Kept Secret
I am not an agony aunt or a relationship expert, far from it, BUT lately I have been hearing more and more about “time delay split ups”, so I have done some “investigations”.
Couples feel that by making these private decisions and working on a exit strategy by “delaying the moment” in telling their friends and families, gives them time to allow and stabilise fragile emotions as well as making it less hard on them and taking some of the immidiate stresses away. So secret break ups are on the rise!
Over the past few years “time delay” splits are on the increase and they certainly have become more common. More and more relationships (marriages for that matter) break down and to manage them, sophisticated strategies are developed. Couples decide to still live together for various reasons and sometimes they even plan to do so for some time, which makes it possible for these break ups to be “the best kept secret” for weeks and sometimes even months.
Listening to people’s opinions, I understand that it avoids outside influences as well as it stops people from gossiping by keeping their splits private until all of the details of separation are at least sorted. As most of us know, even making that final decision, there are plenty of things and issues to be sorted and dealt with.
Rhys, a friend of mine told me some time ago that a time delay split between him and his wife brought back the much-needed feeling of “control” for both of them. With the break up being final, the time delay split allowed them to manage the “fallout” and to work out together how to tell everyone i.e. children, parents, friends. From what I know and what I have seen, it worked VERY well for both of them and their children.
It all sound pretty simple to me, but to me the question remains how time delay splits would work if there was another person involved. I feel that if “cheating” would come into it, it be a total different matter.
Some time ago I came across the article “Is Sex Necessary?”. Reading it again I can only say we all better “get on with it”.
Having regular as well as enthusiastic sex confers a host of measurable physiological advantages, no matter if you are male or female. Of course, that is assuming that you are engaging in sex without contracting a sexually transmitted disease.
Having sex even just a few times a week has an associative or connecting relationship with the following:
* Improved sense of smell
* Reduced risk of heart disease
* Weight loss, overall fitness
* Reduced depression
* Pain-relief
* Less-frequent colds and flu
* Better bladder control
* Better teeth
* Even a happier prostate?
Question is, is there such a thing as too much sex? In purely physiological terms, the answer is this: If you’re female, probably not. If you’re male? You betcha.
Advice on Relationships and Dating With Laura Love
Love-Quotes-and-Quotations.com brings you Laura Love who offers advice on relationships and also dating. Laura starts out with an inspirational quote and gives you some practical hints & tips for making it part of your life.
How Men Can Date Online Successfully
by Owen Jones
A lot of people have taken to online dating like ducks to water because it does work or, at least, it can do. Women are, more often, squeamish of meeting a man that they have been chatting to on the Internet.
All they have heard about are the scary things that can happen and, I must say that they have a right to be careful to the extreme. That’s not only wise but vital. So what is a nice guy to do? You aren’t a pervert, a sexual predator, or a weirdo. You are just a nice guy looking for the right girl for you.
You must be patient above all else. Do not press her for private data like her real name or where she lives. Keep your conversations light and amiable until she feels comfortable talking to you online. Don’t attempt to rush her into meeting you one on one. She will only think that you are desperate or a pervert. Be patient, patient, patient!.
Just be completely honest about what you look like and your job. A good relationship has never been, and will never be, built on fabrication and deceit. Sooner or later, she will find out the truth anyway and then you are back to square one again.
They say that a picture is worth a thousand words. So an idea could be to post many pictures of yourself doing your everyday activities and make them full body (clothed, not rude), not just of your head. After all. if you were dating a girl in the real world she wouldn’t just see your head, would she?
Once the discussion has been opened about meeting face-to-face for the first time, suggest that you meet in a very public place, during daylight hours and that she may like to bring a friend with her.
At the end of the day, you have nothing to hide, have you?. You have been truthful about yourself, and she has already seen a lot of pictures of you. Therefore, the only thing left to do is to make her feel safe meeting you.
More Information:
If you want to learn more about dating, just go along to our website called Sari and Dhoti
Dirty talk is a type of pillow talk. You use vivid words to augment sexual enjoyment before and during the lovemaking.
Talking dirty to men can be anything from giving him insults, vivid images using slang words, to whispering curse expressions to your guy\’s ear.
If you feel timid about it, don\’t be; only the two of you who will be aware of it.
The more you\’ll let go, the better you will be. Your couple\’s life should be hot and wild. It\’s a form of ‘sense of adventure’ that you are giving to your guy.
You might say that you are a ‘good girl’ and you don\’t do those things. Well here is my take on this; if you have preferences in bed, and your spouse is giving enough to fulfill them, maybe I can do my part.
Some guys find it makes them hornier. You can harvest the rewards from this lover\’s game. It makes you feel sexier because you are seeing your man enjoy himself due to your influence. You are providing your guy more excitement.
Lovemaking is at its best when you let go; abandon yourself to the other person is a joyful experience.
Some women use this not only in the bedroom, but in their husband\’s e-mail or work\’s voice mail.
Your guy gets excited to get home and gives you a nice ‘reward’.
What is the top thing to say when talking dirty to men?
1. Tell him what you\’re wearing under your clothing.
2. Put on sexy lingerie and give him a tiny peek when he first sees you. It\’ll drive him mad to want to see more of your outfit all night…until you allow him to see more.
3. Leave him a voice message when he is away
4. at a gathering
5. at your parent\’s house when you go by him
6. right before parting for work
7. Email him some sassy notes
8. Fax it to him
9. Throw hot little texts on his cell phone while is at a sports game with his buddies
It will heat up if you are talking dirty to men at unusual places like:
1. Your parent\’s house
2. at the food store
3. at church?…ok…ok…after church
When is the most excellent timing for this during lovemaking?
From the mid to the end.
You start by telling a physical move that he has made to you and that you had enjoyed. Don\’t worry about feeling embarrassed; he will be more paying attention in the images that you are creating in his imagination.
Are you concerned that you won\’t be excellent at this?
Guys are not hard to light up. It doesn\’t take a great deal for them to get turned on.
If you feel uncomfortable, get some help with a glass or two of wine… Just to break the ice. But please! Don\’t develop a drinking problem!
Having trouble ‘getting it up’? Talking dirty to men might be able to help.
Use this once in a while; they can get too enthusiastic to this. in addition, some men can be a bit turned off or uncomfortable with you unexpectedly starting to talk dirty to them.
You can propose to him to do the alike and it will balance the dynamics.
You can get swear words at the Urban dictionary. It is a slang dictionary. You\’ll be able to get different variations of a slang word.
For instance, let\’s find a variation of breast; there is boobie, nipples, boobs, funbags, just to show a few. Use it to your imagination. Have fun!
At http://www.flirting-dating-men.com you will find more information on how to get a guy and forget about loneliness. You can get more information here for Talking dirty to men
. I remember still how thrilled her father and I were, because apart from anything else, we were not planning other children so that this little girl just made our lives perfect. 
