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Love Addiction - Emotional Neediness
Posted by ViolaLove Addiction - Emotional Neediness
You’re in a relationship that fills you with pain, worry, doubt, anxiety and restlessness. You suddenly suffer from sleepless nights. Biting your fingernails. You sit most nights drinking alcohol and smoking.
Wasn’t it just glorious when you first met? You just couldn’t believe how intelligent, funny and loving he was. You got to know each other. He turned into an angry, distant and domineering man. But you were so insanely in love with him and you accepted any humiliation.
You forgot how to be yourself. You were always alert to his moods. You were helpful and yes, even eager to change. But the day came and you couldn’t take it any longer. You moved out. Well, for one day and than you were back.
Not a lot changed. You still craved affection as well as communication. The way he was hooked on computer games and playing non-stop drives you insane. You can’t stand his lack of needing to be with you. To communicate with you. The missing intimacy. The loneliness and the feeling of sexual deprivation.
You feel dependent, where you want to feel relaxed, be at peace. Change your focus. But you choose to blame yourself, after all, it isn’t really his fault.
Does this sound like you?
Love addiction or emotional neediness is a toxic interplay which I also class as co-dependency. A dysfunctional approach to relationships.
=> Love addicts have overpowering emotional needs
=> Love addicts are unable to love themselves, as they have an empty space within they cannot nurture, calm or soothe
=> Love addicts don’t have a clue who they are
=> Love addicts dislike who they think they are
=> Love addicts have no self-esteem
=> Love addicts rely on other’s approval
=> Love addicts rely on other’s love
=> Love addicts have the need for attention
=> Love addicts have a strong need for passion (mistaking passion for love)
=> Love addicts are exhausting
=> Love addicts can humiliate themselves
=> Love addicts can adapt to whatever their lover admires
=> Love addicts can easily accept any kind of abuse
=> Love addicts are obsessed
=> Love addicts may abuse alcohol or food (many are alcoholics or suffer from eating disorders)
=> Love addicts medicate their pain by going shopping
=> Love addicts are destructive
If a love addict feels rejected, he/she may choose to constantly send text messages, call the other person, become a stalker, or even try and stop a new relationship.
Love addiction is a desperate cry for help! Love addiction is a compulsive behaviour, but I guess all addictions are. Lets face it, all addictions are exhausting and of course deeply destructive. If you are a love addict, you know deep down that you are scared of being alone. Being without your lover. Where in reality you know that you want to be FREE.
So how about YOU? Are YOU a love addict?
Final thought:
Remember, the cause of your unhappiness is not your relationship, that is just the symptom!
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