Although I have left my relationship last year November (2008), one would think that after over a year of single life that things become easier and if not, at least that they are at least getting easier.
“BIG SIGH”
IF only they had… what a dissapointment…
Yes of course, I have my good and bad days and yes, of course, I have more ‘good’ days, but the last two days have been all else BUT‘good’ days.
Maybe it has to do with listening to the words of ‘old’ songs whilst driving? Is it the festive season? Cold, cozy nights indoors? Or is it the end of another year? Who knows? For sure I am going through some emotional turmoil. Dialogue in my head. Questioning my decision and yes, even chest-pain.
What it is about him? I have left after almost 8 years? Am I still missing him? Am I missing his arms around me? Smelling his After-Shave? Listening to his voice? … and yes… there is also his kiss… am I missing it and the rest of it? …
But all I know is that as much as I want to be with him, as much I DON’T really want to be with him… Maybe I should just enter a new relationship? Or would it be ‘wrong’?
I had this in my Inbox this morning. Somehow it is matching to my current situation. I thought I post it on here as it is of GREAT meaning.
“Don´t be unnecessarily burdened by the past. Go on closing the chapters that you have read; there is no need to go back again and again. And never judge anything of the past from the new perspective that is arriving, because the new is new, incomparably new and the old was right in its own context, and the new is right in its own context, and they are incomparable. ”
Love affairs. Who wants them? Only the phrase brings up all kinds of emotions in me.
Love affairs can be so many things, from wonderful to awful, from exciting to frightening, from glorious to hurtful.
For some love affairs can be the most destructive thing in the world, for others the most creative thing in the world.
Have you ever thought how it would be if no woman in the world would ever go out with a married man? And of course, same visa versa. I guess the divorce rate would drop drastically, don’t you think?
Question is, what makes us want to date someone who’s ‘taken’? Who’s already committed? Someone who’s married with a family? YES, someone who IS unavailable?
Is it the adventure? Romance? The excitement of something new? The thrill of the forbidden? Maybe even boredom and YES, is it just sex?
Where will it all end? And what about the many lives that can be destroyed? And even if it goes on for sometime and you get emotionally involved, your heart is on fire and than realise there is no future? Where will it leave you?
Just to remind you, trust IS the basis of a good relationship. The nature of the ties don’t matter, be it boyfriend and girlfriend, husband and wife, friends, siblings, neighbours, fellow workers, parents etc. You have to have some measure of trust with others to have the ability to get on well with them.
Sad but true, but this is really the point most men don’t grasp. Most males expect to ’run’ a relationship on their terms. When, where, what, how and not to forget the time here, HE determines when he had enough.
If you doubt him, he doesn’t support you, doesn’t re-assure you - no, he gets moody, calls you insecure and yes, he calls you needy. Where all you want is take part in his day, share what he’s been doing, support him, be there with love and understanding. You doubt him because of what he says and what he doesn’t say. And the distrust creeps in.
So how do you trust a man who talks about other people, even friends, but he never takes you to meet them?
How do you trust a man who swears his love to you, but he can’t introduce you to his family?
And how do you trust a man who just appears to be interested in your body? Having a fun time between the sheets and doesn’t desire to go out with you?
Love and Adore - Meet like minded Singles in the UK
I’m not sure what to think about dating online myself. I have a couple of friends who have met their partners online, so it does go to show that anything really works.
Love and Adore is a UK online dating service for those who are over 45 years of age. By dating online in your own relaxing surroundings, in privacy and comfort you may meet like-minded singles who are seeking the same things than you are. Who knows, with a few clicks you may even find your Soul mate.
Love and Anger in Your Relationship | Anger, Love’s Poison
It’s impossible for love and anger to run alongside each other. Especially not in a relationship. Surely I don’t have to tell you that anger will ALWAYS push love away. It is almost impossible for someone to receive anger and to continue feeling love towards the angry person.
Anger shows up in many different forms, I.e, sarcasm, hostility, criticism and yes, in many cases even in cruelty. Anger poisons love. Anger is known to be one of the most negative emotions, and negative feelings are powerful. They linger. They are LONG lasting.
We all experience times when we feel irritated with our partner, or even another close member of the family. But at these moments we have a choice. We will almost certainly ruin our relationship if we react with judgement, criticism, conflict or anger. As I said, we have a choice, and we can consciously decide to respond with kindness, understanding, patience and yes, we can also respond with love.
If you think or anyone tells you that arguments are ‘normal’ or a ‘necessary’ part in a relationship, don’t listen and think again. Successful relationships are built with love and respect. By arguing and showing anger you will drive a wedge between you and your partner. And that in turn makes feelings of love and respect for each other impossible. Of course, we do accept the occasional ‘conflict’, and a strong relationship will without a doubt endure the occasional “mistake” and really, we all rather strive for continuous peace, tranquillity and harmony.
So if you want a loving relationship - keep your anger away.
